> I take swearing others to secrecy to generally be a pretty terrible sign.
Yes, me too, I was just thinking about this. There are some good reasons to want secrecy but it enables bad behavior to go unnoticed — e.g. someone naive may not realize they're being treated poorly unless they gossip about it, or a larger pattern of bad behavior may not become visible if everyone involved is asked to keep those interactions secret.
Yeah it’s tricky! I think in general a much softer, “hey I’d greatly appreciate privacy, but if it feels important to share this at any point, go for it” feels a decent bit less icky.
> I take swearing others to secrecy to generally be a pretty terrible sign.
Yes, me too, I was just thinking about this. There are some good reasons to want secrecy but it enables bad behavior to go unnoticed — e.g. someone naive may not realize they're being treated poorly unless they gossip about it, or a larger pattern of bad behavior may not become visible if everyone involved is asked to keep those interactions secret.
Yeah it’s tricky! I think in general a much softer, “hey I’d greatly appreciate privacy, but if it feels important to share this at any point, go for it” feels a decent bit less icky.
do you play botc